If you follow me on Twitter (and if you don’t. Well. That’s awkward.) then you know what kind of shenanigans I’ve been up to.
All sorts of sordid things, really. Most of which have to do with which nerve goes through which of the thousand holes in the skull. And/or the real housewives. Sometimes both in the same tweet.
I like to walk on the wild side.
Last week specifically, though. I reported to the world at large that I had made crack.
One would have thought that the government has the police or the FBI or some official agency carefully searching Twitter for incriminating statements like that. In fact, I was pretty sure that some local authorities were going to knock on my door at any moment and demand that I hand over the goods.
I was kind of hoping for that, actually. Especially if one of them could have looked like Jack Bauer. My response would have been, “Take me away, Jack. I’ve been a very bad girl.”
But. No such luck.
Eventually, after enough time had passed that I had given up on the whole Jack Bauer scenario (sigh. Another one bites the dust.). And after I had gotten a few replies from random people actually wanting to make some kind of drug deal (I found it strangely comforting to know that someone is using Twitter appropriately). I clarified.
Oh, you thought I meant CRACK. What a coincidence! I was actually referring to pizza.
(Not a coincidence at all. But let’s be real. These people are so drugged up that they don’t know what the word coincidence means. I mean, they’re searching Twitter to find illegal drugs. Who does that?)
Actually, though. I stand by my original statement. This pizza. This brainchild of mine. Is actually quite crack-like.
It was first inspired by a ricotta and fig tartine I had a Le Pain Quotidien when the professor I was working with this summer took us all out to lunch on one seriously rainy day in August. When I ordered it, I had no idea what a tartine was but they had me at the word “figs” and the buck stopped there. A tartine, according to Pain, is basically a few slices of toast covered in ricotta, topped with some dried figs, tomatoes, and a drizzle of honey.
Hellagood. But not worth the money when I can go home and reinvent it. And so it was. I was all set to recreate it, in pizza form because isn’t everything better in pizza form, when it dawned on me that a maple-balsamic reduction would be so much better than honey. And the whole thing would taste so much better with rosemary and a touch of sea salt on top.
And though I knew it would be good, even I wasn’t prepared for just how much I would want to eat it every day for the rest of my life. But when I took the first bite, I swear that I swooned. Then I thought, hmm. Maybe that was a fluke. A “fluke bite”. That would be sad. So I went in for a second bite. And man, that was no fluke. That was crack. Pure and unadulterated.
Fig and Ricotta Pizza with a Maple-Balsamic Reduction
Serves 4
For the dough:
3 cups bread flour
1 tbsp instant yeast
1 cup lukewarm water
2 tsp sea salt
2 tbsp olive oil
1. In a small bowl, mix the yeast with 1/4 cup of the lukewarm water and a pinch of sugar. This should start to foam within about five minutes. If it doesn’t, then your yeast has probably gone bad. Not good. Try again with some new yeast.
2. In the bowl of your stand mixer, combine the flour, sea salt, olive oil, and remaining water. Add the yeast mixture. Stir on speed 2 with a bread hook until combined. Then stir for 2 minutes on speed 2 to knead. Place in a greased bowl, cover with a damp towel and allow to rise for two hours.
3. After two hours, cover it in flour and form it into a ball. Allow to rest for 20 minutes. Roll out onto a pizza peel if using a baking stone or a pizza pan if not.
For the pizza:
1 1/2 cups fresh local ricotta
10-15 dried figs, cut into chunks
2 tomatoes, seeded and cut into chunks
1 tbsp dried or fresh rosemary
3 tbsp maple syrup
3 tbsp balsamic vinegar
sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
1. Preheat the oven to 500.
2. In a small nonstick skillet, heat the maple syrup and balsamic vinegar until boiling. Simmer until thickened and reduced by half, about 3-5 minutes.
3. On the rolled out pizza, spread the ricotta. Sprinkle with dried figs and tomato pieces. Sprinkle with rosemary, sea salt, and freshly ground black pepper. Drizzle liberally with maple balsamic reduction. Put in the oven and bake for 10-15 minutes or until the bottom is light brown. Eat.
This has been yeastspotted! And is being submitted to Two For Tuesdays!
Oh my, that does look addictive! Like the ultimate focaccia. Or fo-crack-ia. ?
oooh where can I buy some of that?! Looks amazing!
I have only recently discovered the sweet virues of the humble fig. It seems to magically swing from savoury to sweet in a heartbeat. sounds like my kinda fruit 🙂
wow this fruit pizza looks amazing …very colorful n tempting…
Satya
http://www.superyummyrecipes.com
Yum! Do you take reservations?
Best,
Bonnie
Sorry, I don’t twitter. Yes, I’m one of THOSE people!! I can’t imagine trying to score some crack on it though. I’d love to score some of this pizza though! Gotta tell you though, I’ve never eaten a fig. No idea what it is. I actually JUST saw some on a salad bar, at least I think they were figs, and I thought of trying one but didn’t feel adventurous. I’d totally come over for some pizza though! I’m sure you’d make something with peanut butter for dessert!
will go on a hunt for figs soon! These are the times I miss California. Last yr one of my then collegues dropped a HUGE bag of figs on the common lunch room table. Figs from her tree that were so ripe she weas afraid they’d go bad. Let’s just say that day I was getting up practically every 10 mins!
whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy do you do this to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! hahaha for real though man that looks AMAZING. like ridiculous.
and who is the professor that took you out to eat and can i get his number..
Though this is a very different direction than I usually take my pizzas, flavor-wise, I’m totally digging it! I haven’t been able to find fresh figs around here yet, so I’m relieved that you used dried here. I’m good to go in that case!
That’s it, next time I see figs I’m making this. I knew that first bite wasn’t a fluke.
er clearly tartain means crack!
I love the colors of this beauty! and I most certailinly balsamic reductions!
This looks so amazing. I do love figs, and one of my coworkers actually grows them in her backyard. Let me tell you… fresh figs really are like crack. So addictive. I don’t know that I could go back to store bought. Hopefully she’ll bring some in soon and I can try this out!
Figs are the food of the gods. I found some the other day that were literally almost the size of tennis balls and still sweet as honey. This looks great – I’ll have to finagle the recipe so my no-wheat self can try it out!
This looks sinfully inviting. I love figs.
Thats my kind of pizza! Course, most kinds of pizza are my kind. 😉
Yay! I just acquired some figs. One of my co-workers bought a bunch to work the other day and promptly concluded she did not like them. And, hey, didn’t want them all to go to waste. This looks delicious!
drool…
The minute I saw the title of your post I thought of the tartine I used to have at Le Pain Quotodien! I love that you agree it is totally overpriced. And small. Your version looks much better!
OK. I surrender. I thought I hit payday when I glazed a lamb burger with fig jam. You, my dear, have hit the Motherload. This is pure genius. I especially love the the maple balsamic reduction. I applaud you. (Great photos, too.)
You are too funny! Did people actually tweet you about drugs in response? That is pretty mental.
Ah yes, there you are my lovely fig ricotta pizza. I’ve been waiting. And it was worth it, oh my.
I’ve decided that Twitter is really just a vortex for drugs, sex, food, and political grandstanding. Really, like anywhere else. Which is naturally why I’m on there.
Aaaaand….printing.
Om nom nom! Can I have some now? En entire pizza please. Yeah, that’ll do.
PS: Giggled at your faux drug dealings on twitter. Like you said “who does that??”
This crack-like pizza is clever…how creative! I havent actually made a pizza from scratch before…shall be my next project hehe.
Oh and Jack Bauer! <3 haha
Great dish, once again! I wish I could send you some of the figs I have been stealing from the neighbour. they are really something!
I can see why you would consider this crack-like. It looks creative and fantastic! Nicely done.
Oh Joanne, this is absolutely divine!! LOVE the ingredients you chose, and that reduction is truly inspired. 🙂 SO glad you’re on Twitter. 🙂
Joanne, you are not only a great cook, you win special points for creativity as well. This really is unique and it sounds absolutely delicious. I hope you are having a great day. Blessings…Mary
Fruits and veggies together, what a unique combination. I like that a lot!
It looks so beautiful, love the new combo you have used here,..using ricotta cheese is a lovely idea..thanks for sharing joanne
This sounds like a great pizza. A very nice alternative to the typical marinara and cheese.
Girl, you have out-done yourself. Fig and ricotta is all you had to say to me. But put it on a pizza? With fresh dough and rosemary?! DONE AND DONE. Why do I not live in your kitchen so that I can sneak tasty nibbles?? YUM!
You drug lord, you.
Exceptional job on the pizza, J. Looks and sounds like a dream.
very unique taste going on here. Delightful, I am sure!
This looks INCREDIBLE! I just made a fig, goat cheese, and prosciutto flatbread last night and now my fig obsession has been awakened! I want to make a pizza with them EVERY night I can’t handle it anymore.
Sues
Fig pizza looks amazing..wonderful idea to serve this as a dessert sometime..thanks for sharing..need to try this soon..
I have fallen in love figs. Just last night I had a fig panini. Yum.
Ok, I would be so happy to stick my face into one of these pies and slather it around. Would that be messy? Yes. Good. Thanks for sharing with Two for Tuesday.
I have maple syrup. You laugh, but that’s not easy to get here. The figs? I have 2 trees – enough for pizza every day for months!
You are so funny…and what a great pizza you have there too, figs…I wouldn’t have thought of that. Yum!
if i were really good, i would go home and make this tonight. instead i am starring it in my google reader and keep going back to drool over it until i finally make it 🙂
Jo jo, again you make me CRACK up! This pizza is totally swoon worthy! I thought though that Tartine was actually an individual tart pastry–those folks were short cutting you! on TOAST? noooo~~~~ My neighbor grows figs and as soon as some come up ripe i am gonna steal some and make this! Thanks for sharing on the two for tuesday recipe blog hop! Alex@amoderatelife
I love figs, forgot about them somehow…. I totally understand that you post about makin crack just to get out of todays exam… good luck
Hmmmm…that is quite unusual but I will give it a go :p ..are we wild or are you wild?
If I had a twitter account, I would follow you. <3
I’ve only ever eaten figs in their dried form with nothing at all with them. Actually, I made a figgy jam once but that’s not really all that “out-there” 😛 So I don’t think I’ve graduated to fig pizza yet. Someday, Joanne! Someday…
In the meantime, though, I shall stare at this and tell you that it looks delicious. 😀
I like to procure all of my illegal drugs through the Twitter trade… I’ll take a slice of this crack, too…if ya don’t mind. Sounds frickin amazing…thanks for sharin’ w/ t4t, my friend =)
That’s a really unique pizza! Would love to have a slice.
This is so delicious looking, Joanne. I’m going to make it! Yeah! Figs are my favorite fruit next to banana…
p.s. your photos are extra wonderful here. I love that lighting;)
aw no, so now we can’t be friends (since i don’t tweet)? maybe it’s good enough that i’d eat anything you make 🙂 what a great use for those little jems!!
Delicious Joanne. I am about to receive a shipment of fresh figs. Do you think you could sub fresh for the dried? I’m terrbily unversed in the fig department.
I had a phenomenal fig appetizer at a restaurant here in town – it consisted of ricotta stuffed figs drizzled with balsamic and honey.
I suggest you go make it – now.
This pizza would certainly be a hit at my house with the figs and maple syrup and all!
Seriously, how do you find the time? Are you one of those ppl who just never sleep? I’d say the results are worth it, whatever you’re doing. Oh speaking of crack, have you ever seen that little SNL commercial for hair color that Kelly Ripa did? Google it if you get a chance. it’s hilarious 🙂
Maple-balsamic reduction sounds like something I could pretty much drink. Amazing.
The more variations on the theme of pizza that I run across, the more I am feeling the need to jump on board (it’s the sheep syndrome in me…follow the group, follow the group). Soon. I am going to do it. Soon.
Yum!! Prosciutto and figs are another great fig-topped pizza!
I love all of this. Every last bit of it. It’ll haunt me in my dreams even. What a wonderful brainchild to have!!
Jack should have been there for you and I’m sure he would have been if he didn’t have to run for his life. I loved dried figs and what an amazing use for them.
I read the tweets about this pizza. kept thinking “she has to post this”. and now I leave for vacation in 12 hours and must wait a few more days to make it for myself.
That is a beautiful pizza… excellent use of great ingredients
A maple balsamic reduction? So fancy shmancy and yet so utterly delicious sounding. I am a fan!
Fig pizzas are so good.
don’t get me started on the weird, irrational crush i have on keifer sutherland. i just can’t explain it.
meanwhile, this is my kind of pizza–you know your flavor combination, joanne!
Wow, looks awesome! I love Pain Quotidien … so nice to see a recipe inspired by one of my favorite places!
Well since you don’t live close enough to be my dealer. I will be lifting your recipe to make your home brew crack. Maple Balsamic Reduction-I love it!!!
Well THAT looks perfectly amazing. Nice work. Do you deliver?
Hello Hello! I am off desserts for a couple of days and here you are with such a delicious pizza! Own creation you said? May be you should start your own Pizzeria 🙂
For a sec I thought its from a book and was about to bug you to send it to my event- baking from a book!
This looks lovely, I will have to remember to try this when we have figs in season!
Anotehr incredible creation from the Renaissance woman. Is there anything you can’t do?
do you deliver?
Oh my… this is totally crack! Gah! I must find msyelf some figs!
I want some pizza crack right now! Good grief that is some serious pizza! thanks for linking to Two for Tues!
This pizza deserves its own parade up Fifth Avenue. Spectacular!
um…wow. that pretty much sums up how i feel about this pizza.
🙂
xo Alison
My, oh, my, what a tempting combination!
Figs & Balsamic reduction?? On pizza?? I can’t wait to try this!!
1. I do follow you on Twitter 🙂
2. Oh. That pizza. OMG.
Oh man, I really want to make this. Yum!
Oh Joanne, you are just brilliant with your balsamic reduction and rosemary! A.m.a.z.i.n.g Pizza!!
so sad i have to cut down carbs…boooohooo i want pizza!
Fig ricotta balsamic maple? Did you just pick from a hat of my most favorite ingredients? Fabulous, Joanne. Simply fabulous.
Oh Boy! Le Pain quotidien does not serve ricotta and figues tartines, here. This is not fair! Your pizza looks awesome! Balsamic reduction is a genius idea!
Joanne, LOVE the blog! I just found it and I am going to print off so many of the recipes! I think your writing is brilliant. I will definitely try this pizza, though using dried dates instead of figs just for my preference. I will definitely follow you! I lived in Belgium for a few years, which is the birthplace of Le Pain Quotidien– one of my fave places to eat whenever I go back! I just started a food blog, check it out if you like! http://food-hound.blogspot.com
Too good to be true. On my menu, love it all. Are you sure you’re in the right kind of school?
I needed a good laugh after reading your latest post! Figs on pizza are genius…two of my favorites. It doesn’t get any better than that!
What a gorgeous pizza it is with full of exotic flavors. TH will love this.
Oh wow, this pizza should be illegal! I promise not to report you for excessive yumminess if you send me a piece or two 😉
What a fantastic combo of flavors – definitely crack!
An amazing pizza that makes me smack myself for not looking harder for figs this year! 😉
That looks so good! I wouldn’t have thought of putting those flavors together, but it looks like it really works.
Figs do have quite the intoxicating effect, huh? I definitely think you should get some fresh ones while you still can, just for a good excuse to make the pizza again and compare!
i love this combo! fabulous. i will save this for later. very nice!
This looks so amazing! Just a fun combination!!
Good call with the maple-balsamic reduction! I’ve never had such a thing but I’m sure I’d love it. This pizza creation of yours looks so good though I’m still wary of eating figs.